Thursday, January 16, 2014

Don't Yell At Your Kids!

Hi =)

It's a bit strange for me to talk about parenting guide, tips and etc. as I'm not even close to that stage yet. Although I am at the right age to be one, (well my mom already had my elder sister at my age now considering she got married at a pretty young age.), plus I have some friends that get married right after we graduated and there were even uni-mate (university mate) that brought their baby along to class! (pregnant).

But, from a child's point of view, I also have something to say. Sometimes when I thought there was something wrong with what my mom did, I just told myself, maybe I thought that way because I've never been a mom, I don't know what my mom felt or maybe I'm going to do just the exact way what my mom did when I become a mom. Don't get me wrong, I love my mom, I mean who don't, right?

While replying message from a customer, I found an article about parenting where a sentence from it did caught my attention.

Bayangkan sesuatu yang kita tidak tahu tetapi kita dipaksa buat sedangkan kita sepatutnya diajar terlebih dahulu dengan baik

This sentence really express what I felt all this long. I mean I really can't accept when people say, " Takkan tu pun tak tahu." for a thing that we really don't know how to do it. For example, we eat everyday, yes. But do we know every recipe for food that we eat? Can we just simply know how to cook food just by looking at how other people did it? Well, for me no. Especially when we never did it.

Well, for a kid, they came to the world with zero knowledge. Surrounding, parents, brother, sister, people around them, etc., these are their sources to learn something new. I remember about a story I read from a book wrote by Ustaz Hasrizal, the compilation book of Aku Terima Nikahnya, that tell about his son/daughter (I don't really remember), that wanted to help him cleaning the floor, so they just simply poured the water from the whole bucket instead of using a mop. Well, if I am tired, I think I would be angry too.

But, if we did so, what would happen to the child? They would think "What did I do?", "I just want to help", "I'm trying my best to help my parents, and yet, in return they scold me?" And just imagine the long-term effect that would come out of this. The child might not want to help anymore in the future. Well, the child did something wrong, but that is simply because they don't know how to do it.

I know I might scold my kids one day, from mistakes they did because they don't know how-to. But, I hope when I do it, I would remember back what is felt by a child that genuinely try to help as best as they could with limited knowledge they have. 

Credit: Facebook page Ibubapa Cemerlang


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